Ch-ch-ch-changes

I have eight marvelous grandkids here.  Marvelous in their variety of personalities, faces and understanding of the world.  They often progressed through many of the same things, to wit, these tired little Barbies who have been played with by the oldest to youngest, with just a couple of exceptions.  Now, except for two babies they are all heading off to 4-H at the fair and school next week.  They have soccer practice, physicals and dental appointments, new clothes, supplies and backpacks, and new and old friends to see. 

I've been lucky enough to spend lots of time with all of my grandkids as grandma, a day or two of caretaker while Mom worked, providing transportation, art lessons, and a little bird watching.  I've changed lots of diapers, read books with them, watched hours of Curious George.  I got them to pre-school, put them on the school bus, and played with them.  But that is changing.  They are changing and I am changing.

I fell twice this year, once in the parking lot at K-mart and once at home, slipping on a mat in the bathroom; weren't we warned about those rugs and mats!?  Lots of physical therapy has helped but not brought full restoration and won't.  No more furniture moving for me.  The worst is I can't pick up or carry the babies anymore, or more than one sack of groceries.  I can't put them in their cribs at nap time or pick them up when they fall.  I'm forced to give up baby care on the day that Mom works.     &$#@$* I am very sad. And the home schoolers, including the new first grader above with the Barbies, are all in public school this fall, no more school days at my house during the week. 

Things change, even those Barbies have changed, and we want to see the little ones change and grow and move into their own lives.  Letting go again.  Big changes for me and big changes for them.  Did I mention I'm sad.  I'm sad.  I had this feeling when both my sons left home at the same time.  It's not like I won't see them, but the kind of hands on I've been lucky to have is going away.  The older ones have sleepovers with their friends now and the 14 year old went to Guatemala for the second time on a church mission this summer and my 15 year old niece went to Greece.  Brava girls.

My work this this autumn is to launch myself once more but I will think about it tomorrow Scarlett.